68 players took part in the Marie Curie Stableford competition on Saturday, each player contributing an entry fee donated to a charity that does such incredible work for those facing the final stages of life Marie Curie | The UK’s leading end of life charity | Marie Curie
Gary Taylor and Ewan Mechie were both amongst the very early starters and each notched creditable 37 point totals. Given their early postings, it seemed likely that they’d be overhauled as the day panned out, and indeed they were, but only by one individual, and by the narrowest of margins. Robert Haddock emerged victorious by virtue of the better back nine. Meanwhile, I was getting owned.
I’m confident that every sport has a way of humbling its participants . The goalkeeper letting a daisy-cutter through the legs, the snooker player missing a black off its spot, the fielder muffing a dolly of a catch. For every moment of glory there’s a moment of misery and in that regard I reckon golf is capable of humiliating its devotees more than any sport. It was my turn on Saturday morning.
Having negotiated the first ten holes with relative aplomb, I proceeded to triple bogey the 11th, doubled the 13th and four-putted my way to an ignominious snowman (8) on the 16th after my short game had abandoned me, again. But the coup de grace was to come on the final hole after I’d blocked my drive so far right it perched itself only a few feet beneath the first tee.
It was my rotten luck that the 3ball alighting on said tee were all well known to me, Messrs McKechnie, Hampson and Smith (R). And it was with an element of gleeful anticipation that these three goons looked on as I stood over my twenty yard pitch to the 18th green, willing me to make a pig’s ear of it, the reprehensible individuals.
In that regard, I didn’t disappoint. Drawing back my 60 degree lob wedge in an effort to usher the ball skyward to flop upon the green with the grace of a butterfly landing on a lily pad, I proceeded instead to knife the ball at right angles into the rough, a full on shank that almost took my ball out of bounds. I didn’t want to give these herberts the satisfaction of seeing my anguish and neither did I wish to find them laughing up the their sleeves, so I didn’t look up at them in that moment. However Smith could not conceal his delight as I walked past him back to the clubhouse moments later, grinning like a Cheshire cat and thanking me for the entertainment provided. McKechnie chimed in with further words of insult and only Hampson had the decency to keep his counsel. Well, it was me who had the last laugh because whilst my paltry return of 27 points found me languishing in 53rd position, Smith finished 55th with his 26 points and McKechnie 59th on 25 points. It’s my pleasure to have the last laugh.
| Results | ||
| 1 | Mr Robert Haddock | 37pts |
| 2 | Mr Gary Taylor | 37pts |
| 3 | Mr Ewan Mechie | 37pts |