Stonehaven Golf – a diary

It’s with a degree of trepidation that your correspondent enters the new golfing season. They say form is temporary and class permanent but quite frankly I’ve neither; my form is patchy and the only class I’m familiar with involves yoga. My excitement levels are high but expectation levels low.

It all starts on Saturday (weather permitting) with the Innes Medal, the first of hundreds of comps to be played this year. The greenkeepers have been scurrying around the slopes on seated mowers, rather like the Banana Splits on acid. The fairways needed mowing, the greens cutting and tee boxes tidied, so it’s been all hands to the pump for the greens staff ahead of the new season.

The course is looking lush and so’s my golf equipment. I’ve treated my clubs to a good scrubbing, the Duraglit’s been out and the clubface grooves excavated to within an inch of their lives. My equipment’s good to go but I’m not. My game’s been lacklustre throughout the winter and recent attempts to fix my short game have resulted in thrown clubs and tantrums. My drives are floating apologetically, no penetration on view here, my mid-irons being slapped not struck and even my putting’s deserted me. In summary, I can’t hit a cow’s arse with a banjo and the season’s already upon us.

No matter, I’ll love my golf nonetheless and hope all other SGC members do too (except for a couple who’ll remain nameless,…for now). Watch this space for weekly updates 🙂